Motivational

Why You Should Apply Some Stoicism To Your Life

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In other words; We can't be in control over what happens but we can be in control over how we approach things. We can take control over our own minds; our thoughts, emotions and actions and be the captain steering the boat in different waters and weather. You'll have to distance yourself from your thoughts and emotions and embrace life as it happens with calmness. This is how you'll achieve peace of mind. A strong sense of self awareness is needed for this to be possible.

The name stoicism comes from the stoa Poikile the decorated public colonnade where the philosophers gathered for discussion. 

The Stoics thought that (practical) ethics was the most important component of their philosophy: it was about how to live one’s life in the best possible way.


To be honest, it's just a few years since I heard of this philosophy(even though I've been living this mindset my whole life) and boy every time I think of psychology and how to deal with our own minds and the world around us I think why the fuck didn't I learn anything about this in school. So frustrating, and still is not taught.
Well, I've been and am a firm believer in and follower of this mindset since as long as I can remember with an exception of a few years in my teens but since the age of 19 I have been extremely conscious about how I treat my mind and body, myself and others. To say it as cliché as always, I am my house which I can not escape so I better be gentle. Really, I have to treat it well or else I'll suffer like crazy and life is too short to do that.

Stoicism has just a few central teachings. It sets out to remind us of how unpredictable the world can be. How brief our moment of life is. How to be steadfast, calm, strong, and in control of yourself not matter what happens. And finally, that the source of our dissatisfaction lies in our impulsive dependency on our reflexive senses rather than logic.

So, the stoics try to deal with the world as it is, while pursuing self improvement trough four cardinal virtues:


Wisdom:
Practical wisdom is the ability to navigate complex situations in a logical informed and calme manner.

Courage:
Face daily challenges with clarity and integrity.

Justice
Treating others with fairness even when they have done wrong.

Temper:
The expertise of self restraint and moderation in all aspects of life.

If this doesn't sound like a great philosophy to live life by I'm not sure which planet you're on. Then it is definitely YOU who need to implement this pattern to your daily habits. Too many people these days suffer more from their mind than what reality tells them. Life is all about perspective and if you do not realise it, good luck. Perhaps you'll figure out on your death bed but then its too late. If you are one of those who take life seriously, are easily tempered and blame others for your misfortune and misery its time to start rewire your mind. Life is way better being happy and content every minute every day, always. Embrace what happens with gratitude, meaning, purpose and love, and you'll end up with a peaceful mind.

It’s a tool that we can use to become better in our craft, better friends and better people.

Logotheraphy is also worth taking notice of, its based on stoic principles and is a concept framed by Viktor Frankel who survived a concentration camp.  Logotherapy is a term derived from the words “logos,” a Greek word that translates as “meaning,” and therapy, which is defined as treatment of a condition, illness, or neurosis. It teaches that you can find meaning in every situation you're in, even the most miserable ones. The theory is founded on the belief that human nature is motivated by the search for a life purpose.

Read the famous lettes from Seneca here
The most famous one: Shortness of Life you can find here.
Check out the video below for a brief introduction made by TED.

Tim Ferriss is such a fan and brag about it whenever he gets the chance, which is great. He spreads the word. He also have made a list of great Stoicism resources. Check it out here.

How to apply it by Tim Ferriss

Why The World Needs Gary Vaynerchuck

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When I first came across Gary Vaynerchuck a couple of years ago I felt he was kind of noisy. Who'd listen to a guy swearing angrily when delivering a message? Although I understood how extremely important his words was, he didn't appeal to me at all. Lately he seems to be everywhere. His internet fame is skyrocketing and now, I guess I like him better. His voice is ultra important and the way he does it is actually pretty smart. Cause when you listen to him, it feels like your dad is giving you a lecture and I can therefore see why lots of people get that little extra push to go do the things they love and are hesitant with in the first place. He is an excellent coach, who encourages the best he can and is one of the best out there, next to Tony Robbins who has the same energy, more gentle way of speaking though but its the same energetic lecturing way of being, no evil, not a know it all kind of guy, he does it out of pure love. He wants us people to have a better life, and I guess he also does it with a bigger vision that if people do what they want and live from their heart the world will be a better place. It will be more love and harmony and the world will be driven forward because the sheep culture will keep decreasing, More people will start leading themselves and not be working at some factoryish job with their voice meaning nothing to the society.
I can't say enough how important it is for the world and our society that people start thinking for themselves and that people like Gary keep popping up and that we all start trusting and listening to our inner voices of curiosity and passion and get rid of fear. Do what we love. When more and more people will do this we will jump a giant leap forwards in the development of our society.
What we know looking back throughout history is that we most likely will die being somewhere in between 80-100 years old. Why the fuck shall we live for so long and hesitating and shovel down our inner guide?
Wouldn't you enjoy to stay happy and content for all those years? Live a fulfilling life? No?
I believe the factory culture and pushing people down to stay obedient and quiet just to keep peace within our society is still ruining our lives. We're ignorant and are not taught in school how be the best version of ourself, be a resource to ourselves and our environment in the best possible way. This must change. It doesn't have to be this way, you are worth something, your life is worth a ton. Your time is so valuable.
If you'd like to be of service to others, the world and yourself, keep sending videos about Gary to your friends. Go do a Gary!! We all gotta spread the word to create a movement.

Here is his YouTube channel

He is also on the panel of Apples new tv-series planet of the apps.
 

Choose Your Friends Wisely

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From an early age I've been very cautious about who I've chosen to be my friends. And I must say I've been fortunate to be able to do so because of my skill in making friends. I've made friends easily at both an early age and as a grownup. I know this might be hard if you are not super extroverted.. How it works for me: I can see a public speaker which is super inspiring to me while he/she gives a talk and afterwards I approach them and ask if they'd like to meet up for coffee, most times they say yes, I'm actually not sure if I've ever met someone who's said no. Most people are open for new friendships... And this are how som of my friendships starts.


Anyhow, my point being, there is this saying that you end up becoming the 5 people you spend the most time with. And thats a big deal if you ask me. I'd rather not be a depressing woman only talking shit about other peoples back and not growing as a person, so in order to not fall into that category I need to take action.


I've let friends come and go into my life, because I've always been interested to grow as a person. I've always felt that if a person stop inspiring me or don't do it at all from the very first time, or isn't teaching me something, either during our conversations or just through their actions or behaviour, and if I do not feel unconditional love there is nothing for me to get out of it. If a person for instance has a big ego there is really not much to get out of it.

When high school was over I cut loose them unhealthy and boring relationships and went out searching for inspirational peeps to surround myself with, and I've found many on my way but it's actually not until 2016 I've found people who stood out to me as amazing human beings here in Norway. Every time I think about them I become happy, every moment with them is like a birthday present, and they inspire all of the actions I do in life. They cheer for me and I cheer for them. We have such interesting and educational conversations when together. Conversations that matter. It's friendship taken to a whole new level. With them I develop. With them I grow. They want to change the world and they do it. They wake up every day to make the world a better place for others in their work and as a hobby. To me there is no bigger inspiration than that. Thats the people I value, Thats the people I want to be my friends. In order to be the best version of me I need to surround myself with people who push me forwards. People who want me to grow. I make sure that all of my friends comes from a place of love and are in a mission in life to serve others.

Note to self: Get rid of toxic relationships, run away. If your closest friend drain you or just talks bad about others run away. It doesn't help you grow or become the best of you. Perhaps it's your boyfriend, perhaps it's your best friend, perhaps its your mum or sister, og just another friend you hang around sometimes. STOP! You and your time is precious. Remember that. It's precious. 

 

Relax

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A friend of mine recently wrote me about how stressed and overworked she felt, she argued she had no time for her self, no time to do what she really wanted to do and no time at all to simply relax. Even though she was doing a lot of fun things she didn't feel joyful about it and didn't appreciate nor feel gratitude for any of it, all she could think of was how much she felt that her head was under deep water and how much misery she felt from within. Not only that but she constantly suffers from ear infections and urinary tract infections. Coincidence? 
I asked her what she would want to do then instead? She told me that all she want is to have time to prioritise herself. That's all she wanted. Well, thats rather weird. You see, this girl doesn't have a bunch of kids to feed, she has no family to take care of, she has no obligations in life, at all. Not one responsibility she doesn't design herself. She even has plenty of money. How come this is her situation then? How come a person who has all the opportunities in the world to create the life she really would enjoy and value live in such distress?

I can't believe my ears when I hear such stories like this but this is not a foreign concept for neither you nor society I'm sure of. This is the most disgusting disease, if I may call, running it around in the streets of our decade and filling up our hospitals. Stress. STRESS. S.T.R.E.S.S. Everywhere. Why?
Why? When we have all we need! Which is food, warm clothes and a roof above our head.

Yes, it's often in the news and media. They write about how much inner stress and external pressure people feel and that there is not enough time to breath. Even cancer can develop from the hormones within our body. Cortisol is dangerous. And our pharmacies nearly exist because of our neurotic behaviour outcome. 

So we all should avoid this chaotic tension. Yes, we know that. But why don't we do much about it? Why don't we change our habits and thought patterns instantly while learning how our lifestyle and thoughts affect our wellbeing and our mental abilities and physical function? It should be so easy? But it seem like its just as we know what is healthy food but yet we like eating candy and continues to do so?
Emotional intelligence, EQ should be on the menu in the educational system all day long. How to be human, how to enjoy life, how do deal with your thoughts and feelings basically. How to change patterns and think healthy. This should all be taught over and over again in school. It's a joke that it isn't already long time ago.
I came across the other day that the governments strategy for youth health from 2016-2021 is now about getting emotional intelligence into the subjects in school.  Wow! It is working, slowly but steady. 

All I want to say is for those of you that feel like my friend, or knows someone who might feel that way, perhaps a child, your parent.. Reach out and say..
I know what you are feeling, but remember, life is about enjoying yourself. Do what makes you smile and laugh and feel good about yourself. Its your life, you can create your own. Do not focus on what other people do. Absolutely do not compare yourself to others. Figure out what lights your spirit. You need to design a life then which doesn't give you much physical and mental disturbance. Find out what are the most important factors on how to feel good and have good life. For instance, my overall biggest value in life is time. For some people it might be money but for me the thing which I value the highest is time. Time to do things I enjoy, things that might not even generate money but things that is meaningful to me and that I find purpose in. 
What I prioritise above all is health. Heath comes first. ALWAYS.


Skip this if you like. Boring stuff about me (My dream situation? If I could choose entirely what to do I'd be spending my time writing, reading, exploring great things and meeting interesting people, work from anywhere in the world, I'd also like to make podcasts and youtube videos together with others. I love to communicate and I love to learn. This is what I'd do for the next few years if I could make a plan.
I would love to invest in research and impact businesses. I really wish I had a lot of money so that I could fund all things I find important, like blockchain development, CRISPR technology, research on ending all diseases and ageing, artificial intelligence and Augmented Reality. )

Its your life! Enjoy the little things.

Most important of all, be your own best friend. Talk to yourself like you would talk to your best friend. How do you talk you yourself right now? Do you ever listen carefully to how you treat yourself? Would you treat others you cared about the same way?

But.. What might be the underlying cause of feeling like my friend?

We have to basic emotions. Love and fear. Does stress comes from love? No it branches from fear. False Evidence Appearing Real. But what do we fear? 
Not being loved. We fear that we won't be good enough for our partners, family, friends, acquaintances, neighbours, society and ourselves. We fear that we won't be able to buy food and thus we fail to take care of ourselves and we will be "looked down on". We fear the pitiful, sceptic, laughing and disgustful eyes of society when we do something which isn't applicable with the norms and rules of our culture. But it all gets back to love. We are scared of not being loved , not feeling love from people we want to feel love from or just want to be admired. We always want to be the best version possible and compare ourselves to the top elite of the people in society who gets the most admiration and love. That puts us way down before we even start. Not a chance to get up there immediately. Meanwhile we might feel stressed.

But, you are loved! From everyone. It's just an illusion. Next time you feel lonely and insecure and not loved, think about that the other person you are talking about might just feel the exact same. Why not reach out and comfort this person? Make the encounter about the other person, not you! Shift focus, focus on who you are with, not on how you act when you are around people. Put your focus on others!

Don't be the victim. Be the winner. Change your attitude and perspective and you'll forever be content.

How often do you ask yourself this?

  • How often do you feel grateful? When?
     
  • Do you have meaning that gives you a sense of purpose? When? Why?
     
  • How often do you smile? When was the last time? Doing what?
     
  • How often do you laugh? When was the last time? Doing what?
     
  • When do you truly enjoy yourself?
    • Alone or together with someone? Then who? Where? When? Why?
    • And how often do you do things you really really take pleasure in doing?
  • How often do you feel positive emotions and have healthy thoughts?
     
  • What are you missing in your life? Why is that so? Is it necessary to miss it? Will you die or someone you know die without it?
     
  • What are the things you appreciate the most with your life?
     
  • Are you content with your life? Why? Why not?
     
  • How is your thought pattern? Beneficial or self destructing? Why?


    Enjoy life while being present with the things and people you already have. Feel grateful for it, appreciate it, love it. When you can do that, you'll be content. Never wishing to be somewhere else no matter what situation. You'll feel truly alive.
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Errare Humanum Est

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To err is human. It's human to fail. But what does failing really mean anyways? To me, there is no such thing as failing. To me, failing is equivalent of learning experiences.  "I have not failed, I've just found 10.000 ways that don't work". This quote by Thomas Edison represent how we all should interpret the word failure. Learning. To succeed, you definitely have to "fail" on a small or large scale first. Remember, learning to walk takes a lot of falling down for humans. But we keep falling, hurting ourselves because our instinct says we have to make it. There is no other way. So why don't we apply this mindset to our daily life? It would free us from so much inner stress and the feeling of external pressure. We believe we have to be perfect from the very first time we do something new. It's impossible! How is that even possible? When you've never done it before? Everyone knows that you have to practice to get good at something. But why don't we focus more on the journey than on the end goals? There is something wrong with those cultures who do not appreciate, value and accept the failure and flaws of people and companies. This is how people and companies grow and develop. There is no way around that.
"The only time you fail is when you give up". I can agree on that quote.

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Big Things Have Small Beginnings

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Yes indeed, all big things have small beginnings. Do you know what matters? Action, belief and where you end up. If you're fortunate enough to have a smartphone and/or a computer pluss wifi, you can basically do anything today. All you have to do is start and continue while in hard times. It's easy to look at things from the successful perspective and not looking at what's behind it. Many believe that successful people and companies have always been so but that's not the truth. Struggle, hard work and a few bare hands lies behind it. It wasn't perfect from the start. One great example is Tim Ferriss book "Four hour work week". It was denied by 26 publishers but he didn't give up, he believed so much in his story that he was determined to get it out to the world. The 27th company agreed to publish it. Imagine if he gave up? He wouldn't have had the enormous success he has today, possibly. Don't forget about this. All you have to do is believe and take action.

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